Terrence Real

Twenty years of experience treating men and their families has convinced psychotherapist Terrence Real that depression is a silent epidemic in men; that men hide their condition from family, friends, and themselves to avoid the stigma of depression's "un-manliness." Problems that we think of as typically male; difficulty with intimacy, workaholism, alcoholism, abusive behavior, and rage-are really attempts to escape depression. And these escape attempts only hurt the people men love and pass their condition on to their children.This ground breaking book is the "pathway out of darkness" that these men and their families seek. Real reveals how men can unearth their pain, heal themselves, restore relationships, and break the legacy of abuse. He mixes penetrating analysis with compelling tales of his patients and even his ownexperiences with depression as the son of a violent, depressed father and the father of two young sons.

Stop working on yourself as an individual and start working on your relationship as a couple, with the help of the renowned family therapist and author of The New Rules of Marriage Not much is harder than figuring out how to love your partner in all their messy humanness—and there’s also not much that’s more important. At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating repetitive fights that go nowhere, or a distant relationship in which partners end up living “alone together.” With deft insight, humor, and charm, Real guides you to transform your relationship into one that’s based on compassion, collaboration, and closeness. Us is a groundbreaking guide to a new science-backed skillset—one that will allow you to get past your knee-jerk reactions and tap into your wiser, more collaborative self. With a novelist’s flair, Real shares the stories of couples whose relationships have been saved by these skills and pans out to the culture that reinforces our dysfunction. If you and your partner are backed into separate corners of “you” and “me,” this book will show the way back to “us.” With Us, your true relationship can begin.

Proven Skills for Navigating the Real Challenges of Intimate RelationshipsWhat does it take for couples to sustain love? How can you deepen your relationship even when you and your partner disagree, fight, or let each other down? “Intimacy isn’t something you have. It’s something you do”, teaches Terry Real. “It’s a minute-by-minute practice of connecting to others through empathy, vulnerability, and accountability.” With Fierce Intimacy, this renowned author offers a revolutionary way of living in connection - one that allows you to cherish your partner, yourself, and your relationship in equal measure.How to Communicate with Love and Respect - Even When You ArgueTerry’s approach to relationship is called “full-respect living” - to skillfully and honestly assert your needs while also honoring your partner’s needs. In these six sessions, he presents invaluable training for individuals and couples on developing the skills necessary for this authentic way of connecting. You’ll begin by learning how to clear away the outdated beliefs and habits that keep you from developing healthy self-esteem. Then Terry will help you and your partner transform the Five Losing Strategies that sabotage relationships into the Five Winning Strategies that lead to clear communication, trust, and mutual support.“When we dare to be more vulnerable and open and honest, we are forging new territory”, says Terry Real. Whether you’re still seeking a partner or want to breathe new life into your existing relationship, Fierce Intimacy brings you essential tools for connecting with true respect, uncompromising honesty, and ever-deepening love.HighlightsThe adaptive child - how to recognize and defuse self-sabotaging habits Unhealthy self-esteem traps for men and women Identifying your CNI (Core Negative Image) - a key to making arguments constructive instead of destructive The Feedback Wheel - a four-step approach to revolutionize your communication The Five Losing our impulses to control, retaliate, and be right all the time The Five Winning Strategies for shared happiness, connection, and success

In his extraordinary new book, Terrence Real, distinguished therapist and bestselling author, presents a long overdue message that women need to You aren’t crazy–you’re right!Women have changed in the last twenty-five years–they have become powerful, independent, self-confident, and happy. Yet many men remain irresponsible and emotionally detached. They don’t know how to respond to frustrated partners who just want their mates to show up and grow up.Enter the good In this revolutionary book, Real shows women how to master the new rules of twenty-first-century marriage by offering them a set of effective tools with which they can create the truly intimate relationship that they desire and deserve. He identifies five non-starters to avoid and shares practical strategies for bringing honesty, passion, and joy back to even the most difficult relationship. Using his experience helping thousands of couples shift from despair to profound emotional closeness, Real guides you through the process of relationship repair with exercises that you can do alone or with your partner. With this program you’ll discover how to- identify and articulate your wants and needs- listen well and respond generously- set limits, and stand up for yourself- embrace and appreciate what you have- know when to seek outside helpThe New Rules of Marriage will introduce you to a radically new kind of relationship, one based on the idea that every woman has the power to transform her marriage, while men, given the right support, have it in them to rise to the occasion.We have never wanted so much from our relationships as we do today. More than any other generation, we yearn for our mates to be lifelong friends and lovers. The New Rules of Marriage shows us how to fulfill this courageous and uncompromising new vision.

"What happened to the passion we started with? Why aren't we as close as we used to be?" PROBLEM: If you are a woman who is unfulfilled in your marriage...if you feel unheard or overburdened...if you quietly live in a state of slow-burn resentment...PROBLEM: If you are a man unhappy that your partner seems so unhappy with you...if you feel bewildered, unappreciated, or betrayed... This book offers a solution Bestselling author and nationally renowned therapist Terrence Real unearths the causes of communication blocks between men and women in this groundbreaking work. Relationships are in trouble; the demand for intimacy today must be met with new skills, and Real -- drawing on his pioneering work on male depression -- gives both men and women those skills, empowering women and connecting men, radically reversing the attitudes and emotional stumbling blocks of the patriarchal culture in which we were raised. Filled with powerful stories of the couples Real treats, no other relationship book is as straight talking or compelling in its innovative approach to healing wounds and reconnecting partners with a new strength and understanding.

V svoej novoj unikalnoj knige Terrens Ril, vydajuschijsja psikhoterapevt i avtor bestsellerov, dokazyvaet to, chto neobkhodimo uslyshat vsem ty ne soshla s uma - ty prava! Za poslednie dvadtsat pjat let zhenschiny izmenilis - oni stali silnee, uverennee v sebe, schastlivee i samostojatelnee. Odnako v to zhe vremja mnogie muzhchiny tak i ostalis bezotvetstvennymi i emotsionalno otstranennymi. Oni ne znajut, kak reagirovat na razocharovanie ikh suprug, kotorye vsego lish khotjat, chtoby ikh sputniki projavili sebja i povzrosleli.Khoroshie v etoj revoljutsionnoj knige Ril formuliruet novye pravila braka XXI veka, predlagaja zhenschinam nabor effektivnykh instrumentov, s pomoschju kotorykh oni smogut sozdat po-nastojaschemu blizkie otnoshenija, kotorykh khotjat i zasluzhivajut. Avtor vydeljaet pjat tipov muzhchin, kotorykh sleduet izbegat, i delitsja prakticheskimi strategijami, kotorye vernut chestnost, strast i radost dazhe v samye slozhnye otnoshenija. Ispolzuja svoj opyt pomoschi tysjacham par, Ril pokazhet, kak perejti ot otchajanija k glubokoj emotsionalnoj blizosti, i provedet vas cherez protsess vosstanovlenija otnoshenij s pomoschju uprazhnenij, kotorye vy mozhete vypolnjat kak v odinochku, tak i vmeste s partnerom. Iz etoj knigi vy uznaete, i sformulirovat svoi zhelanija i potrebnosti;*slushat partnera i pravilno emu otvechat;*ustanovit granitsy i postojat za sebja;*prinimat i tsenit to, chto u vas est;*uznat, kogda sleduet obratitsja za pomoschju.Eta kniga poznakomit vas s sovershenno novym tipom otnoshenij, osnovannym na idee, chto kazhdaja zhenschina sposobna preobrazit svoj brak, a kazhdyj muzhchina pri pravilnoj podderzhke sposoben na podvigi.My nikogda ne khoteli tak mnogogo ot nashikh otnoshenij, kak segodnja. Kak nikto drugoj, nashe pokolenie zhazhdet, chtoby nashi partnery byli druzjami i ljubovnikami na vsju zhizn.

В своей новой уникальной книге Терренс Рил, выдающийся психотерапевт и автор бестселлеров, доказывает то, что необходимо услышать всем женщинам: ты не сошла с ума — ты права! За последние двадцать пять лет женщины изменились — они стали сильнее, увереннее в себе, счастливее и самостоятельнее. Однако в то же время многие мужчины так и остались безответственными и эмоционально отстраненными. Они не знают, как реагировать на разочарование их супруг, которые всего лишь хотят, чтобы их спутники проявили себя и повзрослели. Хорошие новости: в этой революционной книге Рил формулирует новые правила брака XXI века, предлагая женщинам набор эффективных инструментов, с п

Zacznij pracę nad swoim związkiem z pomocą doświadczonego terapeuty rodzin.W czasach, gdy toksyczny indywidualizm na każdym poziomie przenika nasze społeczeństwo, znany autor i ceniony terapeuta par Terrence Real, wskazuje, w jaki sposób cierpią na tym nasze związki. Zauważa, że rodziny padają ofiarą kultury, która wzmacnia nasze dysfunkcje.Dobra wiadomość jest jeśli mamy właściwe narzędzia, możemy zbudować serdeczniejszy, bliższy, bardziej namiętny związek."My" jest przełomowym poradnikiem opartym na nauce i wskazującym sposoby postępowania, które pomogą ci być bardziej skłonnym do współpracy. Autor opowiada jak budować związek pełen empatii i bliskości.Jeśli czujesz, że twój związek oparty jest na dwóch "ty" i "ja", to ta książka pokaże ci, jak zmienić go w "my".Dzięki niej możesz osiągnąć prawdziwą bliskość.

Real gives women a long-overdue You aren't crazy, you are right to demand that your mates grow up. Real advises women how to get what they desire and deserve in a marriage. Women want lovers to be lifelong friends. This is a courageous and uncompromising book.